darling don t you know.

i shouted at Charmane, drilled Tze yang and i am not sure if Cindy cried because of me? I never knew this job could psycho people's mind, being so stressed. Hey? you think it is easy? bribe the kids with sweets and stickers (well it does work) but they get so distracted easily and the two hours for studying time passed so quickly that even a simple spelling can t even be memorised.

i shouted at Charmane today because she wouldn t sleep during nap time and she kept humming loudly and kicked her bag around. Please don t think i am impaitient or anything but with 19 girls sleeping while there is a irritant making a racket, in the end you get 20 girls awake. The most dam thing is after you screamed at her and practically feel your blood boiling, she is still smiling away. So now, i found out that staring at her with my killer eyes somehow annoy her. haha! Miss Siok Yan was behind me when i scolded Charmane that she took so long to take out her spelling book and she said i should continue and my first reaction was SHIT, SHE HEARD. haha, i got the power to control her now >:]

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Shawn coudln t take it and took Cindy's toy bear and threw it in front of the class and he got pushed to the floor. However, Cindy got reprimanded instead because she was supposed to pay attention and not fool around and bully those who sat around her and her favourite bear was confiscated. She controlled her tears and during nap time, she took her camping bag and just lie in the heart of the room and covered her face. Normally, i would have to pat her to sleep and tucked her in but she just plonked herself there and shaked you off if you tried to touch her. For the first half hour of the hour, you can hear muffled crying and in the end i just pulled her beside me and pat her.

Soon, it was time to wake up but she just laid there covering her face again. I pulled her hands away as she struggled and in the end i just smack her butt hard and she started crying again. I asked her repeatedly what was she crying about, is it the bear? miss siok yan? but she just ignored me . In the end, i lift her up and hugged her and let her cry it out . It reminded me of my mother so much because that is what she always do for me when i am crying. Cindy finally felt much better and i brought her to the toilet to wash her face and hugged her again. And during study time, she came and hugged me again.

I dunno what is going in Cindy's mind but nobody like her much and she use violence to get her way. I warned her so many times but somehow it never get into her head though sometimes i think she have improved a lil now , she knows that i am watching her and keeps her hands to herself, though she stare at them with as if sharp daggers protruding out everywhere. Another thing is that she can t seem to talk properly, she always look at you blankly with an open mouth and go AHH? i thought she was a 'special' kid but when i see her work written with perfect english , it just simply shocked me. So now, everything i do for her, i teach her manners on the way like Thank you, that is nice of you but she hasn t said one phrase yet. I wonder what will happen when i am gone.

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Tze Yang's brain need to expand. Luckily he didn t fool around when i teach him. But i am glad he can spell 7 words out of 10. However, it is quite worrying , there is still Dictation for him to learn and there is a hard word ' Dilligence' . Before i dragged myself to work, i always shrugged off and groaned when i think about teaching the kids spelling. Thank goodness i can really multi-task well. I really love how i do that now . It helps a lot .

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mommy told me to come home for dinner today because she cooked yong tau foo and i was so happy when i heard that. i had a bad gastric today and a throbbing headache so while waiting for my mother , she suddenly whispered to my ear,

" i save for you the ingredient, the soup but i forgot something... the rice"

the most important thing in the meal. sigh. ;[ hungry now.

yay, i am getting my pay tomorrow, that is what wee kiat said :D
sorry for the long post of moaning .